A polarized population?

Are we in fact polarized along male / female lines when it come to our attitudes regarding sex in our marriages? For the most part, I would say, yes. Particularly in marriages of 10 years or more, which is what I'm focusing on here. In such marriages women consistently come in on the side of "less is better" and men solidly lean towards "more is not enough". A generalization, to be sure, but one that's based on what I observe consistantly, everyday. I've spoken to quite a number of married men and women on this subject. Despite the ads for male enhancement drugs (where there is frequently a wife-type insinuating that she's finally getting what she wants from her once reluctant partner, due to his newly found erectile prowess) most women I speak to have never longed for more sex. They clearly prefer quality over quantity, and most eventually acknowledge that quality sex is probably not going to come from someone they've been co-habitating with for a decade or more. It's an unspoken truth, but going through life's ups and downs with someone, seeing them at their worst and having them see you at your worst...while might create a warm, strong bond... does not inspire sex. It inspires the kind of feelings you have for your siblings, or your parents, or your children. Sex becomes counterintuitive for most women at this point. Men on the other hand, are much more capable of using their imagination in a sexual situation. Sexual fantasy is second nature for them and as a result they can override any image that might act as a turn off; they can override an unromantic environment, a tense mood or a 10 + year history of being side-by-side in the trenches. They will seize the opportunity to have sex virtually any time they can... And relish it!

How is this dichotomy best handled? Does anyone have ideas on this? If so please comment. In the mean time I'll continue to share my thoughts on this in... Sex and Marriage : Untold Truths.